Dialogue in the dark

So, this week quite a bit of stuff happened. Found out some unfavourable news, had a minor meltdown (although not strong enough to actually get me to do any actual work) about thesis and well, NUFFNANG!

For some reason, nuffnang's been incredible to me this week, got invited for a movie screening (the book of life, i've drafted out a review but haven't got around to stringing it out properly yet) and, AND, an invitation (with a plus one, obviously I took my wife -Michelle-) to Dialogue In The Dark, the exhibition and the dining portion, Cuisine In The Dark (this month it's Thai, which was pretty interesting).

Dialogue in the Dark started in Germany in 1988 by Dr Andreas Heinecke, who lost his eyesight in a car accident. If you've ever wondered what it feels like to suddenly lose your vision, like the many people who have glaucoma or are born with vision defects, this is really something you have to try. In the exhibition,you're given a cane and guided only by the sound of a guide's voice (our's was a really pleasant foodie, Jeff). My eyes stayed wide open the entire time, but there really wouldn't have been any difference if i had decided to keep them closed. In an unfamiliar place, it was really quite hard to navigate. We had to sit on a bench at one point and even that was rather hard, as was finding the chairs at our dinner table.

enjoy the view?

I've never quite experienced such a complete darkness as this before. even closing your eyes and blindfolding yourself isn't as all-encompassing as this was. Within two short turns in the exhibition, you couldn't even make out a single thing, except for the faint green dot of the infra-red cameras (yes, this means we were probably recorded -which would be a hilarious thing to see one day- but it also means we were safe). I kept waving my hands in front of my face, nothing.

At certain points, it felt quite overwhelming, everyone talking loudly, trying to be heard, the other sounds from the speakers.. it really does become that much harder gauging distances, remembering who's speaking etc. I had a finger in my eye at one point and hands may have grazed other parts.. ehem*. It was really funny.

Michelle at one point, stuck her cane between my legs and ran it all the way up to my knee. It was completely accidental but it did make me jump. It's also completely hilarious. sneaky chelley. I know it's dark, but you can't be nasty in public hahaha. 

Personal space became a thing of the past. No more bubble. Voices also seemed to appear suddenly and from no where, each time incredibly close, no more than a hand's width apart, i'd wager. A little shocking here and then, but more comforting than anything. We weren't alone.

About the exhibition, it was pretty interesting and we definitely learned a lot.. Although what stuck out most was perhaps not really the goal of the program but still. it was pretty big, I'll get to that later. Everything was executed really well and the "locations" were pretty diverse, a beach, parks, suspension bridge (which was pretty terrifying because they shake it while you're on it), a market, ATMs. They really give you an idea of the basic struggles.. And also make you think about awesome memorising skills.

About the dinner portion.. Well, that was something. Very interesting. I'd never really thought about it before but eating becomes much harder when you can't see. You can't tell when you're plate is really empty, what it is... You become a lot less picky. Because you can't see, you eat anything set in front of you. They never told us what was set in front of us, so we had to take the figurative leap-bite and guess from there. It was a pretty filling meal. i had expected it to be more of an experience type thing where we'd get bite sized portions of food that we could just pick up and put into our mouths, but it turned out to be a regular thai dinner, there was even green curry chicken. That was pretty odd in my opinion. I kept losing my chicken because i'd scoop it out of it's cup and then suddenly, i wouldn't be able to feel it's weight on my spoon.

There was even an after-dinner game where we had to take turns (randomly) reciting numbers, seeing how high we could go. There were about 50 or so of us, i think. Like Liza (one of the guides) said, we needed patience, instinct, and, we needed to really listen. We got up to 15, everyone applauded.

As someone who loves art, photography, exploring.. I kept visualising the places in my head as we were brought to them. Dragging out representations of them from the back of my mind. i remember thinking numerous times how important sight was to me, perhaps most out of all the senses. I kept trying to picture our guide, it's not easy to match voices to nothing.

I kept thinking of how it'd be like if my world was perpetually like this. How i wouldn't be able to explore places like i do now. How painful it must be to have my sight fade away, slowly or suddenly due to certain circumstances. It sounds incredibly small and a little petty, but i can't imagine what it would be like to grow up without knowing colours. The amount of respect I feel for these individuals. And i know it may sound like you should pity them, but that's not what I'm saying. Being blind does not make you any less capable, it might make you much more so. It's a form of living, just different. Still as it always does, it comes down to perspective.

Make the most out of what you've been given. I love how the experience tells us that. Nothing's ever too much. You can work through it.

chelle and i with our guide, Jeff

The thing that stood out to me most though, was how being in the darkness changes people. Before entering, chelle and i, along with most others kept to ourselves, social norms and what not. Within a minute of entering the exhibition, that took a 360 turn. People started speaking out more, reaching out, laughing, being helpful.. Everything changed (like when the fire nation attacked. haha, couldn't help myself. excuse me).

There was one point where I couldn't find an empty spot on the bench we were supposed to sit on and one of the guys in our group simply reached out his hands.

"here! follow my voice, you can sit next to me"

and almost immediately i was seated. Being equally vulnerable in the dark, everyone changed so much. Even michelle and i, who usually shy so far away from holding hands and being touchy with each other, found ourselves squeezing each other's hands at all random times, whenever our hands brushed.

Without our vision, we all somehow stepped up, if that's the word. like a reverse Genovese syndrome, the opposite of diffusion of responsibility or bystander effect. We all helped each other, without needing to be asked, or cued. completely au naturale. We spoke without restrictions, laughed. The whole lot.

it was.

Makes you think. Maybe we would all be better off blind.

i remember thinking how chelle and i had made new friends and that this really was such a special experience we all shared together.

"Let's have a proper introduction and conversation once we get our sight back".  Everyone laughed and agreed.

We didn't. 

Why?

When we got back to the land of colours, everyone scattered, like a bowl of fruit someone threw out of anger suddenly hitting the floor. No one said a thing to each other. it was almost like what we all experienced in there never happened. Our eyes never met. and even in the slight instances they did, it was somehow different, so much less personal and so awkward. Eventually, we all hung around awkwardly taking pictures and just left.

I'm not sure exactly how to articulate this, but it left us with a sinking feeling in the pit of our stomachs. I wonder if they felt it too.

we were all somehow alone again.

What is it about being in the dark that makes us all better? Is it the vulnerability? A shared consciousness only accessible in the dark?

Is it that without any sources of light, we learn to create our own?

Well that took a rather dark turn (pun intended). That said,

I do wonder though, you know how sometimes we close our eyes and just imagine things, or even when we dream, there are pictures or schemas translated into moving pictures? How would they look if you never saw anything in your life? What would you dream of? Is it a purely tactile type of experience? How would that work?

In any case, if you ever have the chance, do sign up for this. it really is quite an enlightening experience. You learn a lot about them, others, human connection, and even yourself.

Just in case you're interested/lazy, here's some of the details.
You need to book in advance so, +603 5891 6212 

Admission Rates

The experience

Adult (18 and above): RM30 

Youth (13 to 17) : RM25

Child (7 to 12): RM20  

Cuisine In The Dark RM 180 per pax

It does say this on the website, but in case you're not planning on checking that out before signing up for this (unlike me lol), I'm not going to reveal the big surprise, which comes at the end of the experience. But let's just say the guides are pretty damn amazing. They know where you are in the dark, they know when someone's lost. They just do.

Anyway, on to the next part of my life, my gender studies assignment. I'm going to bake, and you know what that means. Keep your finger poised neatly over the emergency button on your phone. We may need the fire department. HAHA. but in all honestly, we'll see how this turns out.

brace yourselves.

Once again, THANK YOU NUFFNANG! :B