so naturally, here i am at 2.35AM, blogging. of course. it's only logical.
tomorrow's my first day as a student tutor and at first, i was completely freaked out, you know insecurities flying all over and what not. now, i am so excited. so excited, in fact, that i have been doing nothing but trying to sound as crazily enthusiastic as i can about action potentials and neurones, which honestly, isn't that much far off on how i usually feel about them, because hey. that shit is amazing. like whoa, zoom zoom zoom.
i've actually started talking to my room about the things i'm going to say and what will happen if they don't answer and stuff. let's just hope it goes well tomorrow *internal screaming*
since i'm already here, i may as well get to other stuff too.
let's talk about leaning.
so today i was on the bus to main block to collect a couple of things for work and suddenly, i feel this weight on the right side of my head. i clearly remember thinking "hmm.. feels like an elbow...".
any normal person would've probably shrugged it off or glanced up or something. i, well, i just sat there and tried my best not to move, lest leaner-person find out that he/she was leaning on me. what an embarrassment for him/her!
so i just sat there and tried hard to be a part of the bus.
"THINK LIKE THE BUS. BE. THE BUS."
needless to say, the HELP buses aren't exactly famous for a really hyperlapse smooth type of journey (what is really, hyperlapse is amazing). at one of the first corners, everyone jerked to the side, myself included. poor leaner-dude was so shocked, i think he thought he broke the bus or something.
i just gave him a, well i tried to make it, good natured laugh and smiled.
three things popped into my mind.
number 1, that i need to learn why it is that i go out of my way (i think pretending to be a part of a bus is a pretty worrying sign) to make it comfortable for a complete stranger ish rather than just saying "oh excuse me, you're leaning on my head haha" or something to that effect. that wouldn't have taken much. would it?
number 2, i really need to do something about my posture. it really is terrible.
and number 3, this has happened before. in a lift in Bangsar shopping centre. A big family came in after my mom and i. we were all pretty cramped up in there and i was pressed against one of the back corners. suddenly, the dad (who also happens to be the largest person in the family) just.. well, leans on me. and this one was really, just complete-bodyweight-there-is-a-obviously-only-a-wall-behind-me-and-not-a-tiny-squashed-little-girl type of lean.
..
it blew some of my breath out of me to be completely honest.
and again, i just stood there, i did laugh though and my mom just stared in horror. thankfully, the guys kid made him aware "DAD. YOU'RE CRUSHING THAT GIRL". although, the idea must've been so ridiculous to him that he didn't seem to acknowledge or understand the meaning or context of that sentence until we were almost at my floor.
in a way, this was completely hilarious.
when something ridiculous happens to me (pretty much a norm at this point of my life), i try to look at it as a third person. and boy, is it hilarious.
sometimes, i'm not even sure if i'm in pain or if i'm happy or sad or mad about a situation. because all i think about it "good god, that was so funny!" and even when i recall one of those experiences, i see them from a third person point of view, which has got to be a little strange. i mean, come on.
i don't know.
alright i'm going back to prepping.
IT'S GOING TO BE SO FUN.
I WILL MAKE THEM LOVE ME.
MAKE.
THEM.
oh and in case you want to know what's "up"
i got semi-inducted into this video thing (isn't that always the case) and had to bite a model. mmhmm, you heard me. i can't attach the video here though, such a shame, but anyway click "this video thing" it'll take you to it.
andale, andale!
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